How To Help a Friend

Do you have a friend who is upset about his or her parent's drinking? You want to do something to help, but what? Your friend may feel a little uncomfortable or embarrassed talking about this, but you can still be a good friend. One out of four children lives with at least one adult who has alcoholism or abuses alcohol, so your friend is not alone.

• Be a good listener. Your friend may need someone to talk to. Listen to your friend and suggest that she or he talk to a trusted adult in addition to talking to you. You can offer a good listening ear, but sometimes an adult is needed for more serious things. Maybe you can suggest a caring adult for your friend to talk to, such as a teacher, a neighbor, or a grandparent-someone who will listen and support your friend, someone who will not hurt your friend or put your friend down. Refer your friend to our resources for help.
• Don't spread gossip about your friend's family. It's okay to tell your parents or another trusted adult what is going on, but respect your friend's right to privacy by not telling other kids in your class.
• Ask your parents if your friend can hang out at your house, and then invite your friend over for enjoyable activities or to do homework together. Sometimes your friend might just need to get away and have fun being a kid.
• Don't ride in a car when a friend's parent has been drinking if you can avoid it. It is not safe. Call your parents, walk, or try to get a ride with an adult you know who has not been drinking. If you must get in the car with a drinking driver, sit in the middle of the back seat with your seat belt buckled. Lock your doors and try to stay calm.